Call Back Interview and Reality Check

Here are some of my musings tonight.

First, I interviewed for a staff attorney position on Monday and on Thursday, I received a call back interview.  I was really excited.  Let me share with you first that this job is nothing like I imagined doing when I went to law school.  There is no court room involved.  More contracts and torts work (love torts, not so much on contracts!).  But, I am excited.  First, because it is a small office enviornment and close knit.  I can tell that they are looking for a really good fit to be a part of the team.  Second, law is the not the primary purpose of this business.  I would be a staff attorney for a trade association.  I like this thought.  My job would be primarily teaching CLE classes for a trade.  One thing that always bothered me about working at the DOJ was lack of people contact.  I like people (most of the time).  I like human interaction and miss it when I don't have it.  I also do not like drafting the same motions over and over and over.  This job would be varied and I would remain in a constant state of learning.

Which brings me to my next musing.  I went to law school to prosecute.  I took a high concentration in criminal law and I love it.  However, having these last few months off to study has also given me time to reflect.  I had started becoming jaded and cynical with almost a cop mentality.  Everyone was suspicious.  Everyone was a potential child abuser or criminal.  I really don't want to live my life that way.  And certainly, while my child is at home, I don't want to be someone who ticks the criminal element off to the point that someone might try and hunt me down.

Also, after four months out of law school, I am really quite tired of all the legal questions that come my way on criminal matters and divorce.  I kind of want to be able to honestly say "That's not my specialty.  I can give you the name of someone."

I guess I say all this to admit that maybe I am wussing out, or maybe I am changing my mind, or maybe I never really knew what I wanted to do to begin with?  I don't know.  I am just open to all things.  I am open to all possibilities.  And I am excited that this job will be new and interesting -- keep your fingers crossed for me.  They said they want to make a decision by September 24th (btw: bar results come out that day too!).

EDIT TO ADD ON 10/6/2010:  I had to read back on what I wrote here and admit something......this job would have been a copout for me.  I was MADE to do trial work, whatever that may be.  I was made for the cut and thrust of litigation, the challenge, the thrill, the chase, the stress, the nerves, the first responder attitude I have, all of it.  I was uniquely created to take up a mantle that few lawyers have taken up and few are cut out to do.  I would have taken this job for two reasons:  1.  Fear of failure and 2. Lure of money.  Really, not until I held the "Thank you, but we are not hiring you" letter did I really, really evaluate how much of a sell out this would have been.  And how much a breaking of a sacred trust this job would have been for me (more on this thought to come).......  MORAL TO THE STORY:  Be open to different TYPES of law, but be TRUE TO YOUR SELF!