Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Pulled in many directions

Single parents wear a ton of different hats. We are the chauffer, the parent, the counselor, the cheerleader, the cook, the dry cleaner, the nurse, the teddy bear, the safety blanket--and many others.

I feel pulled in so many directions sometimes. Between student, employee, and mother--I start wondering what about me? I am finding it very difficult to continue to balance all the hats on the rack without something falling off. I am starting to fear that that "something" is going to be a little bit of myself.

I carve out time for me, I do. I try to take care of the body, mind, and soul. But these days I can feel the stress just building, and building.


  1. Hi Lisa,
    I just read this page of your blog and wanted to thank you for writing this... just knowing another single mom is doing this and struggling with the same things is comforting to me. I'm in the beginning of my first year of law school, and single parenting my 4 yr old - it's been a tough transition, especially w/ also trying to squeeze in a relationship I barely have time for... and I often find myself pulled in so many directions, too many it seems. The trouble I have is that in giving all of myself to school and to my daughter, I find myself feeling so alone and lonely in the process - Not that I want to partake in the partying and games of the younger folks in my class, but I miss the people I love in my life, and have been wondering, is this really worth it?!

  2. Hi! I am in my last year. I go through these times of feeling like I can't do it anymore, but then I am okay again. The thing is that I do believe it is worth it. I am making a future for myself and my daughter. Three years of putting me on hold is nothing in the scheme of things.

    Now, I don't know what I would do if I had a relationship on top of all of this, to be honest. I made choice to put that on hold until I am done with school. Do I get lonely? Absolutely. But I have nothing left at the end of the day for someone else.

    Make sure you are carving at least one day where you don't open a book. Spend that time with friends or family. Use that to catch up. What has worked for me is to approach school like work--8-5 is all study. When I do this and buckle down, I don't spend a whole lot of additional time on school work outside of those hours.

    Also, know that if you are in your first year, then right now you are hitting your first "wall" time. Meaning, the stress of everything is pulling at you something fierce. This is normal and happened to me in about week 9 of law school. It does get better, I promise. Hang in there and know that in the end, you won't regret it.