From the Single Mom's Law School Experience, then "Almost Attorney" to FINALLY an Esquire!: Stress: When the body gives out

Monday, December 8, 2008

Stress: When the body gives out

Stress manifests itself in so many different ways. Often it creeps up on us and then BAM, we feel the effects. For the past several semester of undergrad and then the last two of law school, I would get an upper respiratory infection. This was how my body would deal with it. This semester, no upper respiratory infection---but something else happened, something unexpected.

I had a final on Monday. Finished it okay and started studying for the final on Wednesday. I was having a hard time focusing and I was feeling really tired, but I was exhausted from this semester anyway, so I thought nothing of it. I kept telling myself, "Just 10 more days, just 10 more days." Wednesday I woke up and my body was screaming, it hurt from head to toe. Everything was tight and I was physically nauseated from the tension. My final was a four hour final in the afternoon. So that morning I called the day salon to see if my massage therapist could get me in after the exam. She had a cancellation, so I booked.

That night was bliss. She took away my pain and I felt wonderful. Thursday, I was unusually tired, but I thought that it was because of the relaxed state of my body. No problem, my next final was not until Monday a.m., I was set to go. I woke up Friday morning, got ready to take my daughter to school, sat on the couch to put my shoes on and BAM--radiating pain centering in my back and down my right leg, and up the right side of my back. I was crying, rolling in pain. My daughter was totatally freaked out. She called my mom. I told my mom I was going to pass out from the pain, she freaked out. She came over to my house and took me to the doctor.

The weird thing is that I have never had any real back problems, at least not since my accident 13 years ago. There was no pull, pop, or snap when I bent over. No known injury. And then my doctor says, "You are under alot of stress, sometimes out bodies start shutting down as a warning." Just what I wanted to hear! He prescribed vicodin........................

Pain medication and studying do not mix. Apparently I am also one of those few people that vicodin does not make groggy. I just get a little space cadetish like. So long and short of it is that expect the unexpected during exam times. The stress will manifest itself in ways that you will never be able to predict.

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FAQ

Lots of people ask me: how do you do it? How do you attend law school and raise a child alone? My answer is simply that you prioritize. You approach school as an 8 to 5 job. I take Friday evenings and Saturday's off. Study a bit on Sundays. For me this works. It means not being a part of the "social" things at school, and that time between your classes is in the library studying. But that's okay. You will have different goals then the students who are single with no children.

How do you afford it? Student loans........yes, you heard me. My reasoning is that my earning capacity will double, but likely triple, which means that I can afford to take on the debt to pay for a better future for my daughter and I.

Does you daughter resent you studying? No. Sometimes she gets frustrated, but she really does understand the bigger picture. She is my biggest supporter. I have learned to include her by taking her to class with me when I can, by having her help me study with flash cards, and by taking her to appropriate events at school. In fact, I did an incoming student panel one year, and the administration of the school had her speak as well. We are a team, and that includes this journey.